my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
