I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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