the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
