Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
