with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Woke up backwards on a recliner
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Randomize
