Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
