I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
