I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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