the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize