I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
