I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize
