Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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