Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Randomize