I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
