I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
