my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize