Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Randomize
