I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
