just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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