You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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