trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
My feet surprised me
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
