She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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