We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
