it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
There r osticjed everywhere
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
