summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Randomize
