Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
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