I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Randomize
