the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
