there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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