whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
pop tarts are not kleenex
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
