Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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