I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
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