what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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