Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
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