I skipped work to stalk him.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
do herpes really smell.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
