apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I supernannyed him into submission
Randomize
