marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
