they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Randomize
