I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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