I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
