would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
