Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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