We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
i already hear my dad disowning me
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
