those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
