Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
