Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize