remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
