they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Randomize
