you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
