im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
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